Novel-in-a-Day 9

15 books have 2 versions, and 4 books have 2 versions. So 3^15*2^4.

Of course, that should be 15 books have 3 versions, and 4 books have 2 versions.

It should have been 19 chapters with 3 versions but four people didn’t submit! :confused:

Dude, you’re taking all the mystery out of it!

But given the number of typos I’ve made in setting that out, nobody will believe me.

Mystery? I suppose.

Can someone work out the length of shelving required for the 229,582,512 versions. Also, some sort of cataloguing might be useful, given the identical covers. :smiley:

Each heirloom edition of Butterfly Dawn comes stamped with its unique nineteen character identifier code and is personally signed in blood by pigfender. So reshelving is a breeze! And each set is custom printed to suit your personal shelving needs. As successive volumes may be printed in ever smaller font sizes, this handsome set of collectibles is a perfect fit for every home or even a tiny efficiency flat over the Suds n’ Duds such as yours. Impress your friends with an entire wall, floor to ceiling, of your latest 229,582,512 novels! Why wait? Order yours today! (Same day shipping after the sun goes down.)

Am I speaking to you? What with your yellow 15 and steaming white mug. Oh purlease! Why and how? And has Mr Fender enough blood for the whole set?
The Suds n’ Duds has closed.

Only a supply teacher like my “boyfriend” can think of something like that. Might want to show this to him some day; he loves maths to bits.

The answer to all four of your questions is Yes, definitely yes. (We don’t know where he gets all the blood from, but some say he goes on some kind of 24-hour spree each year. I would look there for answers.)

Sad about the Suds n’ Duds.

The “boyfriend” teaches supplies? Or about supplies? Or about “supplies”? I mean, we know from previous that he works hard to earn his quote marks, but why do none of these sound like an actual job one could have. Perhaps those scare quotes go deeper than we ever imagined.

Now I want a t-shirt that says “I [was part of a team that] wrote 229,582,512 novels in a day.”

The TTNM-FETT-FTIAD 2019 tee!

The air quotes is because in real life I am famous for whining about not having a boyfriend which honestly I’ve never had in my whole life — not even a first — and I’ve been wishing he’s my boyfriend for almost a decade but he’s not and I literally died Googling him but after a twist of fate in which we connected on a professional level I kept pushing him away so that he wouldn’t suspect me of scouring all over the Internet including the WayBack Archive for traces of him. I do have a baby crush on the real broadcast journalist who sometimes stands in for his colleague’s show when that colleague’s away, hence “supply (=substitute) teacher”; he actually said “I’m your supply teacher today” in the introduction of one of those very shows. Now you can imagine how he time-traveled to 2020 and caught up with his colleague; the magic of multimedia wrangling. :blush: A scary writer’s confession indeed. Now, is the writer scarier or the confession?

No, wait. Maybe the journalist aka “boyfriend” himself is the scariest, since he enjoys playing devil’s advocate to his guests, and peradventure suck their blood while the camera’s not looking.

Quick recap on said “boyfriend”:

  • he is a broadcast journalist
  • my chapter is all about his fav hobby
  • at his job, he’s sat on a toilet, been hit by a ball, dropped a tool that took a TV station off, mounted a satnav on his car amid a wild sandstorm, sang karaoke while being self-conscious of his terrible voice, traveled to 2020 to meet his colleague (in some peculiar way) … all the while being filmed or recorded in some other fashion (this would have hinted at a career in broadcast media)
  • he loves maths to bits
  • he doesn’t know this forum exists (unless he stalks me back)
  • he’s snowed under
  • he’s influenced my contrib to NiaD 9
  • he doesn’t know I’m his secret admirer for almost a decade

TGC,

Plot for your next novel? :smiley:

GR

1 Like

Not just a “next” novel — he’s become my muse against my better judgment, and he’s spawned at least two works of art and three pieces of writing from me, including NiaD 9… The funniest thing is that his upcoming programme is going to be about crime, and he doesn’t know he’s been tracked clandestinely by this little girl…

I agree.

Couldn’t see 7-9! Can you send me a link?

pigfender.com/NiaD_Badge/7-9.png

Finally gonna get my chance to sit down and read this rip-snorting tome come Thanksgiving week! Woot!