The important thing to remember is that there are always three different computers involved in the syncing process. Each with its own HD where it stores the project:
Your Mac
The Dropbox server
Your iPad
On the Mac the Dropbox app is constantly monitoring the Dropbox folder when the Mac is awake. Any files changed on the Mac are immediately uploaded to the Dropbox server HD.
In Scrivener, every document in the Binder is its own file in the file system. As soon as you do something in a document, even if you only move the cursor, as soon as you pause for a few seconds that document’s file, inside the .scriv folder (which looks like a file in Finder but is actually a folder) is re-saved on the Mac HD. The Dropbox app notices that the file has changed and uploads it to the DB server, over-writing the corresponding file on its HD.
If you then look at the project on the iPad, it won’t now what happened if you had Scrivener open, because iOS Scriv doesn’t have that kind of background DB app because it can’t. iOS Scriv checks the DB server for changed files when you start iOS Scriv, but if it is already open you need to manually tell it to check for any changes by tapping the sync icon.
The keyword to long-term successful syncing is - patience! Being in a hurry is no good. Give all steps plenty of time.
Close the project in Mac Scriv and give the DB app a few seconds at least to sync everything, before closing the laptop.
Always tap the sync icon in iOS Scriv before opening a project.
Always tap the sync icon in iOS Scriv before changing app on the iPad and leaving iOS Scriv.
Always wait a few seconds when you have re-opened your Mac laptop before opening Scriv, and check in Finder that the project is up-to-date before opening it. If you want to be really sure, tap the DB icon in the top menu bar, and check that the latest changes have been downloaded and there is nothing waiting.