Novel-in-a-Day 3: With a Vengeance

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nom
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Sat Oct 19, 2013 11:58 pm Post

matt wrote:
pigfender wrote:I'm going to be a while compiling things and making them look pretty now, so please take this time to discuss amongst yourselves what lessons Matt should take from this year's exercise for when he runs it next year...


Ha... Next year's story will be set in a quiet rural Australian town. There will be talking Kangaroos and dingoes carrying off babies and everything.

Everyone will greet each other with a G'Day, and then stand around nodding at stuff, because you don't talk in a small farming town coz you already know what everyone else is going to say... That, and if you open your mouth, the flies get in.

What's that, you want pig fender back in control? Bad luck pig fender, I tried!

Matt


Matt, you left out some bits. Everyone stands in the street because of the drop bears (technically killer koalas, but we'll use the local lingo) in the trees and the crocodiles in the creeks. And Nicole Kidman—I mean, our heroine—wants to adopt a little aboriginal boy and Hugh Jackman—I mean, our hero—has muscles but is a decent bloke. And everyone wears hats. That's important. The baddy can have a nice hat to show that he has money and everyone in small farming towns knows that only baddies have money. He probably runs the baby-dingo racket, but that's OK because the dingoes are trained to only go for tourist babies and the tourists are outsiders. Have I missed anything?

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ChiaLynn
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Sun Oct 20, 2013 12:00 am Post

Someone needs to get eaten by a shark.

Or a saltwater crocodile.

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r6d2
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Sun Oct 20, 2013 12:06 am Post

Montree_Whiles wrote:Folks, next year let's get a chat room?

Unfortunately, AFAIK chat rooms are incompatible with talking Kangaroos on nice suits...

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michaelbywater
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Sun Oct 20, 2013 12:12 am Post

I like this. Can it be set in Warracknabeal? And bags I the odd bloke in the Akubra 'Sombrero' model who spends the entire novel trying to shape it into that weird Bush Tucker Man bash but can't because he's a galah. If you don't know what a Bush Tucker Man Bash is, it looks like this:

BTM640x480.jpg
Bush Tucker Man Bash
BTM640x480.jpg (40.77 KiB) Viewed 1227 times


Bush Tucker you don't want to know about. Big maggots, basically.

A galah is the sort of bloke who'd live in Warracknabeal and think a Bush Tucker Man Bash was somehow appropriate. Like wearing a wingsuit in Amsterdam.

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Montree_Whiles
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Sun Oct 20, 2013 12:16 am Post

So last year our page count for posts got up to 19. The year before, 25. So this year we're at 24 and the compilation is in work. Any wagers on the page count for this year. Okay, I'm stalling. Got a chore or two I don't really want to get to. ;)

Or, better yet, what will the page count be this year over previous years once the compilation is done?
Last edited by Montree_Whiles on Sun Oct 20, 2013 12:36 am, edited 1 time in total.

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matt
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Sun Oct 20, 2013 12:21 am Post

michaelbywater wrote:Bush Tucker you don't want to know about. Big maggots, basically.

I still remember my grandfather trying to convince me to eat a Witchetty grub when I was about 5. Of course, they're normally cooked, I believe. This one he just dug up in the garden.

Not sure he would have let me go through with it if I was game... He didn't need to worry!

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nom
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Sun Oct 20, 2013 12:36 am Post

michaelbywater wrote:I like this. Can it be set in Warracknabeal? And bags I the odd bloke in the Akubra 'Sombrero' model who spends the entire novel trying to shape it into that weird Bush Tucker Man bash but can't because he's a galah. If you don't know what a Bush Tucker Man Bash is, it looks like this:

BTM640x480.jpg


Bush Tucker you don't want to know about. Big maggots, basically.

A galah is the sort of bloke who'd live in Warracknabeal and think a Bush Tucker Man Bash was somehow appropriate. Like wearing a wingsuit in Amsterdam.


Sure! Warracknabeal is near my old home-turf. Nowhere near the sea, so sadly no sharks. Not enough water in the irrigation channels for crocodiles. But the snakes! Oh boy, spoilt for choice there and plenty of them can kill. And there's some pretty good spiders too. Only a couple that could kill a galah but, let's face it, you don't need many and they can turn up anywhere (dunny seat is my favourite). Petty good range of bunyips in the billabongs round that area and the emus will attack prams if the dingos slack off. So yep, Warracknabeal gets my vote!

I'm looking forward NIAD 2014 already...

PS For bush tucker, you left out the ants and the dirty sticks. Add them to the maggots and you've got a meal.

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nom
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Sun Oct 20, 2013 12:48 am Post

Reading back through the threads while waiting for the red carpet, I saw this:
pigfender wrote:s means I have sent the briefing pack.
r means I have received confirmation that the pack has been received.
i means the completed chapter has been submitted back to me... and I've been able to open it.
The + is a medal of honor for valiant attempts to stay on topic in the face of overwhelming odds.


I won a medal! :)

I think I might need some more sleep.

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pigfender
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Sun Oct 20, 2013 1:08 am Post

You don't want to sleep. You want to read a book!
NiaD3.jpg
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Available for download here:
http://www.pigfender.com/index.php/2013 ... niad-2013/

LET ME KNOW WHAT YOU THINK!

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matt
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Sun Oct 20, 2013 1:11 am Post

pigfender wrote:You don't want to sleep. You want to read a book!
NiaD3.jpg


Available for download here:
http://www.pigfender.com/index.php/2013 ... niad-2013/

LET ME KNOW WHAT YOU THINK!


I think that's a very nice looking cuff on the cover!

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pigfender
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Sun Oct 20, 2013 1:11 am Post

Apologies for the lengthy delay in getting these files finished and uploaded. I had software issues, which are either caused by the fact that I've not slept in 42 hours, or something else that is far less likely now that I talk about it out loud.

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Reliquary
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Sun Oct 20, 2013 1:15 am Post

Hurray!
*rushes off to load up the tablet*

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r6d2
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Sun Oct 20, 2013 1:16 am Post

pigfender wrote:Apologies for the lengthy delay in getting these files finished and uploaded.

Nice suit!

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pigfender
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Sun Oct 20, 2013 1:16 am Post

I will be uploading the Scriv project file, plus compile settings, but that is likely to be several days away. Not least of all because I'm sure you have better things to do, but also because I Suspect it is going to be quite some time before Mrs Pigfender let's me borrow her laptop again!

G'night all!

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nom
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Sun Oct 20, 2013 1:18 am Post

G'night PigFender, sleep deep, sleep long and sleep well. We're all grateful for your efforts and looking forward to the read.

Just downloaded Made Man and opened in my ebook reader. I may be gone a while...